Day 3: Alone

I am alone as I write this.  My blogging the last few years has been more intentional; less about the stream of consciousness in my head and more about the specific experiences that I want to share.  This is largely due to the fact that I have evolved into a more social creature throughout my time at college.  While freshmen and into sophomore year I spent Friday and Saturday evenings blogging, now I am hanging out with friends, visiting my boyfriend, or just sleeping.  But here I am again blogging, alone.

The physical alone however is not the heart of this reflection (though it is worthy of other musings that I may delve into at another time).  The kind of alone that I want to focus on is the alone that we feel even while surrounded by people, by friends, even by family.  This type of alone brings my heart to tears.

It is the type of alone that screams at the world “you don’t understand!”

It is the type of alone that cries us to sleep at night.

It is the type of alone that causes us to pull farther away, when what we really are in need of most is company.

To enter into relationship takes trust.  It requires a certain vulnerability that can be challenging to muster.  It requires humility, setting aside what we are proud of and humbly coming to another.  It is risky, and sometimes it fails.

God is with us through the alone.  God sees our weakness, our brokenness, and loves us despite these truths.  God gives us strength and courage even when we don’t think we have what it takes.  How can we bridge the alone?  How can we support our brothers and sisters?  How can we have relationship without opening up to be known?

The picture today is a crowd of people in Boston.  What is it like to be alone within the crowd?  More importantly, how can we support each other through the alone?

An additional note.  This is a video a saw a few years back that I think beautifully captures the struggle between the acceptance and intimidation of alone.

Day 2: Look

I have thought about this word all quite a bit today, pondering what I should post and what picture I could use.  I began with the verb, to look.  What can represent looking?  It occurred to me that used in everyday context, most of the time our attention is drawn to look at something.  Look at that.  Look at me!  Look at this.  It is a direction to call our attention to _________ (fill in the blank).

But, this being a reflective piece, I challenged myself to look beyond the obvious.  What do we see when we aren’t looking for something?  Or phrased differently, what do we miss when we are only looking for something in particular.  When we focus our attention on details that are most often ignored, we see the whole picture, and our subject of interest is brought into the context in which it is placed, gathering meaning, wholeness, and depth.

God is at work in this world.  God is at work in every creepy crawly thing beneath the earth, every flower that brings color to creation, and (yes New England) every snowflake that flutters to the ground.  God is at work in every person that passes on the street, every child in a playground, every friend met for tea.  God is active.  Sometimes though when our focus is immediate, we miss God’s marvelous works infiltrating every aspect of our lives.

I chose a Where’s Waldo cartoon for today.  In this puzzle we are challenged to LOOK, to find Waldo amidst the intentional distractions.  Can you find him?  What else is happening in this picture?  Do your eyes skim frantically for the familiar red and white stripes?  Or do you examine each person, pausing before moving to the next?  How do you look?

The beach scene was intentional.  Ahhh don’t we wish for a warm summer day :)

Day 1: Announce

Today, Ash Wednesday, marks the beginning of Lent.  In the Christian calendar the period is marked by a time of repentance, fasting, and centering on God as we prepare for Easter and the celebration of Christ’s resurrection.  The ashes come from the palms used on Palm Sunday the year before, and are mixed with oil or water and drawn in a cross on people’s foreheads.

The ashes are used to represent our mortality.

Genesis 3:19 – “By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread until you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

These ashes represent every measure by which we fall short of God.  They represent our sins, and more importantly they represent our need for repentance and forgiveness.  Lent is marked by fasting, so that we remember our failures, while ever holding on to and preparing for the hope that arises with Christ’s resurrection on Easter. 

Through Lent we are preparing.  God prepares us to wipe away all that is broken, all that is marred, all that is hopeless, so that on Easter morning we are fresh with the promise of life, forgiveness, mercy, and grace through Jesus.

Traditionally, Christians fast during this 40-day span.  This may take the form of “giving something up,” a certain indulgence or bad habit perhaps; like chocolate, or Facebook.  Other times you will hear people “taking something on,” such as a practice to reconnect with God and make time for spiritual renewal; like daily devotionals, or 10 minutes of resting silence each day.  All this is done in the spirit of refocusing relationship with God.

This year for Lent I will be jumping on the UMC bandwagon of #picturelent #rethinkchurch #ashtag (ok, enough of that).  Each day I will post a picture and short reflection according to a schedule someone somewhere created.

I am excited about this project because it will be challenging.  As most of you know, I am incredibly literal.  I will try here to look for and recognize meaning in places I wouldn’t have taken the time for previously.  I will try to refrain from posting the obvious (eyes for “see,” my back yard for “wilderness”) and instead think more holistically about the meaning of the word and it’s impact in my life.

Day 1: Announce

It occurred to me today (after much deliberation on what picture I could post that represented the word “announce” – picture of a trumpet dis-included on the grounds of being too literal) that I have not formally announced to the social media world my intentions to enter into ministry.  I am somewhat ashamed of my lack of openness, why have I been hiding such an exciting decision?  I suppose my approach, one of careful consideration and deliberation, was very personal.  I dipped my toes in the proposition ever so slightly, testing the waters over the past four years, and always hesitating to take the final plunge. 

Well.  The waiting is over.  It is time to get over my selfishness, and give glory to God for this wonderful new step in my life.

I will be attending Divinity School/Seminary in the fall.  Where, I am not yet certain.  I have formally begun the candidacy process in the United Methodist Church, and hope to serve in youth/children/camp ministry or chaplaincy, or wherever else God may lead.  Through the specific type of ministry in my future is still unknown, I see this call as an extension of baptism; a venture to work full time as a laborer in God’s plentiful harvest.

I chose this picture because it is from the day that I visited my first theological graduate school.  Carly had planned a trip, and she graciously let me sit in on her plans and tour the school with her.  Little did I know that I might be attending one day!  I am so very grateful for the people in my life who affirmed and guided me towards this calling.  I love you all!

Peace,

Emily